Despite green being the in thing, rednecks across america are having to fight for the right to be themselves. Housing associations across America have gathered together to put a ban on hanging laundry to dry out in the sun, stating that the pure fresh air and non-appliance powered method is outdated and Neanderthal-like. “People haven’t dried their laundry in the sun since the industrial revolution and it’s not time we started now” said a spokesperson. Another mentioned “It’s our God-given right as Americans to flaunt our technology and show the world we can be as lazy as we want. God bless America.”
Neighbors everywhere have stated outrage at the simple energy saving methods being employed by Carin Froehlich, declaring she’s just not capitalist enough, and that her choosing to opt out of contributing to America’s energy needs are hurting the economy. The complaints have ranged from “I just don’t like seeing clothes on a line” to “that communist might as well be burning flags on those clothes lines.” Froehlich has declared “If my husband has the right to own a gun, i should have the right to hang my laundry out to dry.” Many people in touch with the pulse of America’s future however feel that this rejection of modern technology and increased energy bills are irresponsible, and hurting America’s image as a self-sufficient nation.
Despite the protests of the housing association and the accusations of communist affiliations, Forehlich says she’ll continue to hang her laundry.
Although, we did find this flag among other articles hanging out to dry on the line: