Just some Thoughts

I’m alive. I barely blog anymore. I’ve been really busy working on some things I think are helping me develop as a person, and I’m glad about those. I’ve been building a business and coming up with some interesting innovations in my back pocket.

I’m working with a partner and an investor to bring a startup accelerator to my local area, and I’m excited about the prospects. I’m honestly depressed about the elections. No, I’m not a Romney supporter, I just think our country is in dire straits and no one is acknowledging the serious deficit we have in culture, unity and excellence. I’m worried about the state of perpetual warfare we find ourselves in, and I’m sad that many people I know still think of the world in terms of America= the only moral good. I’ve been watching clips of HBO’s The Newsroom and wishing more politicians had the courage to say these things, but also that more people had the courage to hear these things.

I understand the conservative frustration with America’s narrative falling short in terms of the power to unite all Americans, but militarism isn’t the answer. Militarism is the delusion of grandeur. Innovation and education in my humble opinion form the actual basis for greatness, and it strikes me as a stark tragedy that we’re the most information accessible society to ever exist and yes, by and large we’re nothing to shake a stick at, but imagine the potential.

I see a serious need for change in the way we do almost everything, from politics to education to technology to cultural interaction. On this side of last year’s Occupy Wall Street movement, and all the work I put into it, I’m proud. Occupy Sandy has made me proud too. That this was and is a force attempting to carve out a commons from a culture that is obsessed with and fetishizes individualism gladdens me. I am also glad to see tactical populism, people banding together to independently form solutions to life’s problems. I think that things like Occupy Sandy are the way of the future, and that the internet is helping us build entirely new models of organization, communication, finance and more. It’s noteworthy.

All in all, I think I’d like to say, thank you for all who have read this blog over the years, I’m sorry I’ve been so remiss. I have plans to talk about things and just have fun. Unfollow if you’re not into what I start talking about, I won’t mind. I’m just going to treat this as space where I can rest my thoughts. I’ve been needing an outlet and there are few places better for me than the pen/keyboard.

I’m disappointed in myself too. I’m not who I was when I started this blog. Sometimes I regret that, sometimes I am proud of it. Sometimes, it’s whatever. I’m not really surprised at most of who I’ve become, and I am glad that I am where I am. I see so much injustice in the world sometimes, and it’s made me bitter at times. I see so much evil, and it’s made my heart weary. But I also see good things, and good people, and that’s made my heart glad.

It doesn’t really matter who the fucking president is, not because I’m here to offer you some “God is still on the throne” statement, but because really, presidents do little, and at the end of the day, the person most responsible for my life and my future is me. Besides, whether God is on the throne or not, that phrase is more often a passive aggressive way of saying, “I didn’t get my way, so I hope you know I’ll just go above you.”

I’m exhausted, and I have little to offer in the way of comfort or hope. Whatever we do, I do it first as a human questing for kindness and gentleness in a world made cruel through conquest. Whatever I do, I will try to write more honestly, more deeply, and more thoughtfully.

It’s my sincerest hope that I can get back to theology and philosophy in the near future. I’ve got plans to write some posts, but in the interests of not disappointing, I won’t announce them, in case I don’t write them.

Anyways, you’re all awesome, and I’m gonna pick up blogging about open source and doing film reviews as a general direction spiced with some other things here and there. I can’t say what the future of this blog holds, but thanks for sticking around if you do. And you’re welcome to leave if you don’t want to read it.

Thanks for being my friends.

I need you.


7 thoughts on “Just some Thoughts

  1. You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything brother. We may not always agree…….Its an honer to know someone as passionate and driven as you. I look forward to working with you in the future.

  2. Hi, Eli,
    I don’t even know if you’ll remember me, but we used to write back and forth when I was doing my “Open Your Eyes and Love Them” and “Shamayin” blogs. I just got your post in my inbox, and it was so touching (and sad, somehow–although I don’t know how quite yet) that I felt compelled to comment and say hi. It sounds as if you’ve been doing some good things, and some interesting thinking. I agree with many of the things you say here, although I must say that I was very relieved this morning when I woke up and learned that Romney (and, perhaps even more, Ryan) will NOT be “running the country.”
    As for me, a few weeks ago I finally published a memoir I’ve been working on for about 22 years (about when I worked as a caseworker for people with AIDS in NY in the late ’80’s)! My new blog here is about that; I’ve closed down the others for now.
    Anyway, I’m glad you checked in. We had a nice little group of bloggers a few years ago, and I’ve missed it!

    Take care,

    • Yeah, It’s been a while. I took up doing things for Occupy in my city, and then my life fell apart, and now I’m recovering from some of that and writing again, because I’m trying to wrap my head around some things. I remember when we used to correspond. I’m glad I’m not forgotten.

      Also, I’m glad Romney’s not running things too, but not necessarily for obvious reasons. I think he is far less callous than his image and lack of personality belie. But I do think it was important for Obama to win in order to shatter the myth of the white majority.

      Link me to your blog?

    • I’m very sorry that things got hard for you; I hope they’re better now. And I’m glad you did Occupy; I had become quite cynical about things, and I also try for the most part (beyond essentials like voting in this election) to remain apolitical because I don’t think that you change human hearts and minds through politics, but I was intrigued and made more hopeful when the Occupy thing started. It just seemed that people were waking up, perhaps.

      Romney personally may be a very compassionate guy, but he seemed politicaly soulless, and his choice of Ryan (who REALLY scared me) as a running-mate was, well, questionable. I would have voted for Obama either way, because I believe that his heart is truly in the right place, and I agree with you about the “myth of the white majority”–although I don’t think it’s “shattered” in all minds just yet (hey–I live in Jacksonville! 🙂 ). I often worry about his safety, and that of his family–particularly now.

      The new blog is at: http://holdingbreathmemoir.wordpress.com/. There’s a description of the book on the “About” page.

      Glad you’re back!


  3. Good to be back. I didn’t vote Obama, and couldn’t. He’s still the spineless politician of four years ago. Big on rhetoric small on implementation.

    Now that he’s in office, he’s backing down from the homosexual civil rights issue, and he’s also escalated drone strikes in Yemen again. The only hope he’s delivering is that change will be less driven by the personality in the oval office and more by the people who take their polity into their own hands.

  4. I understand your point, but on the other hand he’s up against a lot of resistance. As I said, I don’t put a lot of faith in politics, but I felt compelled to vote. In general, as I also said, I believe that change comes from somewhere else.


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